Thuhet se ne v\u00ebrtet dashurohemi vet\u00ebm me tre persona gjat\u00eb jet\u00ebs son\u00eb. Megjithat\u00eb, besohet gjithashtu se ne kemi nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr secil\u00ebn nga k\u00ebto dashuri p\u00ebr nj\u00eb arsye t\u00eb ndryshme.<\/p>\n
Shpesh her\u00eb e para \u00ebsht\u00eb kur jemi t\u00eb rinj, madje edhe n\u00eb shkoll\u00eb t\u00eb mesme.
\n\u00cbsht\u00eb dashuria idealiste \u2013 ajo q\u00eb duket si p\u00ebrrallat q\u00eb kemi lexuar kur ishim f\u00ebmij\u00eb.
\nKjo \u00ebsht\u00eb dashuria q\u00eb apelon p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb ne duhet t\u00eb b\u00ebjm\u00eb p\u00ebr hir t\u00eb shoq\u00ebris\u00eb – dhe ndoshta familjeve tona. Ne hyjm\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb me besimin se kjo do t\u00eb jet\u00eb dashuria jon\u00eb e vetme dhe nuk ka r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi n\u00ebse nuk ndihet mir\u00eb, ose n\u00ebse na duhet t\u00eb g\u00eblltisim t\u00eb v\u00ebrtetat tona personale p\u00ebr ta b\u00ebr\u00eb at\u00eb t\u00eb funksionoj\u00eb, sepse thell\u00eb brenda ne besojm\u00eb se kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb ajo q\u00eb duhet t\u00eb jet\u00eb dashuria.
\nSepse n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb lloj dashurie, m\u00ebnyra se si na shohin t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme se si ndihemi ne n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. \u00cbsht\u00eb nj\u00eb dashuri q\u00eb duket e drejt\u00eb.<\/p>\n
T\u00eb biesh n\u00eb dashuri p\u00ebr her\u00eb t\u00eb dyt\u00eb: Dashuri e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb <\/p>\n
E dyta supozohet t\u00eb jet\u00eb dashuria jon\u00eb e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb \u2013 ajo q\u00eb na m\u00ebson m\u00ebsime se kush jemi dhe si duam ose kemi nevoj\u00eb shpesh t\u00eb na duan. <\/p>\n
Ky \u00ebsht\u00eb lloji i dashuris\u00eb q\u00eb dhemb, qoft\u00eb p\u00ebrmes g\u00ebnjeshtrave, dhimbjes apo manipulimit. Ne mendojm\u00eb se po b\u00ebjm\u00eb zgjedhje t\u00eb ndryshme nga t\u00eb parat, por n\u00eb realitet ne ende po b\u00ebjm\u00eb zgjedhje nga nevoja p\u00ebr t\u00eb nxjerr\u00eb m\u00ebsime \u2013 por ne vazhdojm\u00eb.
\nDashuria jon\u00eb e dyt\u00eb mund t\u00eb b\u00ebhet nj\u00eb cik\u00ebl, shpeshher\u00eb q\u00eb ne e p\u00ebrs\u00ebrisim vazhdimisht sepse mendojm\u00eb se fundi do t\u00eb jet\u00eb disi ndryshe nga m\u00eb par\u00eb.
\nMegjithat\u00eb, sa her\u00eb q\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqemi, ndodh q\u00eb p\u00ebrfundon m\u00eb keq se m\u00eb par\u00eb.
\nNdonj\u00ebher\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e pash\u00ebndetshme, e pabalancuar ose narcisiste. Mund t\u00eb ket\u00eb abuzim apo manipulim emocional, mendor apo edhe fizik – me shum\u00eb mund\u00ebsi do t\u00eb ket\u00eb nivele t\u00eb larta drame.
\nKjo \u00ebsht\u00eb pik\u00ebrisht ajo q\u00eb na mban t\u00eb varur nga kjo histori, sepse \u00ebsht\u00eb slit\u00eb emocionale e ngritjeve dhe uljeve ekstreme dhe si nj\u00eb djallues q\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqet t\u00eb gjej\u00eb nj\u00eb rregullim, ne i p\u00ebrmbahemi t\u00eb shqet\u00ebsimeve t\u00eb ul\u00ebta me pritjen e t\u00eb mirave.
\nMe k\u00ebt\u00eb lloj dashurie, p\u00ebrpjekja p\u00ebr ta b\u00ebr\u00eb at\u00eb t\u00eb funksionoj\u00eb b\u00ebhet m\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme sesa n\u00ebse do t\u00eb duhej n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. \u00cbsht\u00eb dashuria q\u00eb ne do d\u00ebshironim t\u00eb ishte e drejt\u00eb.<\/p>\n
T\u00eb biesh n\u00eb dashuri p\u00ebr her\u00eb t\u00eb tret\u00eb: Dashuria q\u00eb zgjat <\/p>\n
Dhe e treta \u00ebsht\u00eb dashuria q\u00eb nuk e shohim kurr\u00eb t\u00eb vij\u00eb.
\nAjo q\u00eb zakonisht duket\u00a0e gjitha e gabuar p\u00ebr ne dhe q\u00eb shkat\u00ebrron \u00e7do ideal t\u00eb q\u00ebndruesh\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb cilin jemi kapur p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb supozohet t\u00eb jet\u00eb dashuria. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb dashuria q\u00eb vjen aq leht\u00eb sa nuk duket e mundur. \u00cbsht\u00eb lloji ku lidhja nuk mund t\u00eb shpjegohet dhe na rr\u00ebzon nga k\u00ebmb\u00ebt sepse nuk e kemi planifikuar kurr\u00eb. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb dashuria ku ne bashkohemi me dik\u00eb dhe thjesht p\u00ebrshtatemi\u2014nuk ka asnj\u00eb pritshm\u00ebri ideale se si duhet t\u00eb veproj\u00eb secili person, as nuk ka presion p\u00ebr t’u b\u00ebr\u00eb dikush tjet\u00ebr nga ne.
\nNe thjesht pranohemi p\u00ebr ata q\u00eb jemi tashm\u00eb – dhe kjo na l\u00ebkundet deri n\u00eb palc\u00eb.
\nNuk \u00ebsht\u00eb\u00a0si\u00e7 kemi paramenduar se do t\u00eb dukej dashuria jon\u00eb, dhe as nuk i p\u00ebrmbahet rregullave q\u00eb ne kishim shpresuar ta luanim t\u00eb sigurt.
\nPor prap\u00ebseprap\u00eb ajo shkat\u00ebrron nocionet tona t\u00eb paramenduara dhe na tregon se dashuria nuk duhet t\u00eb jet\u00eb ashtu si\u00e7 kemi menduar n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb jet\u00eb e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb dashuria q\u00eb vazhdon t\u00eb trokas\u00eb n\u00eb der\u00ebn ton\u00eb pavar\u00ebsisht se sa koh\u00eb na duhet t\u00eb p\u00ebrgjigjemi.
\n\u00cbsht\u00eb dashuria q\u00eb gjith\u00ebsesi duket m\u00eb mir\u00eb sepse nuk ka iluzione.
\nAsnj\u00eb dram\u00eb, asnj\u00eb g\u00ebnjesht\u00ebr, asnj\u00eb mashtrim. Ky person do t\u2019ju doj\u00eb p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb jeni. Edhe ti do ta duash. Dashuria nuk l\u00ebndon, dhe kjo dashuri do t\u2019ju m\u00ebsoj\u00eb se si t\u00eb doni n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn e duhur. \u00c7do dit\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb bekim. Ju m\u00ebsoni se si ta doni veten dhe t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt n\u00eb nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb tjet\u00ebr. Ndiheni mir\u00eb dhe jeni t\u00eb lumtur.<\/p>\n
Nga lovewhatmatters.com
\nP\u00ebrktheu neutrale.al<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Thuhet se ne v\u00ebrtet dashurohemi vet\u00ebm me tre persona gjat\u00eb jet\u00ebs son\u00eb. Megjithat\u00eb, besohet gjithashtu se ne kemi nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr secil\u00ebn nga k\u00ebto dashuri p\u00ebr nj\u00eb arsye t\u00eb ndryshme. Shpesh her\u00eb e para \u00ebsht\u00eb kur jemi t\u00eb rinj, madje edhe n\u00eb shkoll\u00eb t\u00eb mesme. \u00cbsht\u00eb dashuria idealiste \u2013 ajo q\u00eb duket si p\u00ebrrallat q\u00eb kemi […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":55633,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-55632","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-te-tjera"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/55632","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=55632"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/55632\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":55634,"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/55632\/revisions\/55634"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/55633"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=55632"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=55632"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neutrale.al\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=55632"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}